shooshee

This is just too good not to share. This is an email conversation that’s been going on in the office today. It’s Friday, so of course we’re all a little less than serious. Names have been changed to protect the “innocent”…

subject: OOO - 3:30pm today (and a quick blurb about Oslo)

p1: Norway time is creeping up on me…. Will head out today at 3:30pm.

j1: Ditto for me. As to the trip outside of work, it was fun. We saw the city, got well acquainted with planes, trains and automobiles and learned that any beer under $15 here in the US is a bargain. Oslo is one expensive city. We have some fun Norwegian treats for a happy hour early next week.

m: What with the hop shortage of 2008 and rising fuel costs, there might not be too many beers under $15 here in the US for much longer… Luckily, even if beer fails us, scotch and bourbon are both inelastic goods. Have a great weekend, looking fwd to Norwegian happy hour.

l: I also remember an agave shortage that spawned White wine margaritas throughout NYC one year. Such a sad year.

d: I propose a First World Relief Fund. So our grandchildren won’t have to endure pan-tragic epi-travesties such as these!

m: I would like to subscribe to your newsletter and donate to your charity, but I just took out a 2nd mortgage so I could stock up on IPAs, tequila and can/bottle openers: the family will be well-prepared for the upcoming Peak Beverage crisis!

p2: i’ll contribute once there’s a catchy tune and marketing campaign that costs more than the fund actually brings in ~ we can make a difference!

d: Oh man… We don’t have the theme song ready yet. But we’re working on getting some real generous down-to-earth heavy-hitters like Mariah Carey, Kid Rock, and John Oates to kick off the song. It’s gonna be called “Yo, Can You Top This Off For Me (For The Childrens)”. I’m really excited about it.

And marketing-wise, we just have the logo. I think it sums up our point of view quite nicely.

s: Just to note: if you’re unable to procure those specific celebrities, I think this group of Japanese celebrity impersonators will do in a pinch: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=36w-CyqCO1A&feature=related

d: Wow. Although I was much more fascinated by the folks impersonating an excited audience! Good stuff.
PS – OOO is the new NWR. Please update your mail filters accordingly.

p2: pfftt… that jerk bono too good for us huh?

d: There’s always someone who just can’t see the big picture.

l: Oh boy. This is going to sting, but Bono and Kid Rock have joined up with my alternative cause. I have organic tshirts under my desk for only $18 dollars, the price of a beer in Oslo.

d: Well who needs you and your more-clever foundation! I’ve still got John Oates on my side!!! And my shirts are free-range hemp!

j2: You’ve left out someone very crucial to your success:

d: who’s that?

and then the side-bar IM discussion…

d: when i was doing a google image search for the $100 for my foundation logo, the first one ended up being a fill-screen goatse. You’re welcome, R.

me: oh dear. I am crying over that one.

d: so was i.

d: then i was trying to make a SFW goatse joke about that oprah pic but couldn’t come up with one. can you believe it?

me: oh lawdy - that might’ve been retinally damaging

d: oh god, no! i was just going to use words!

me: oh thank goodness

d: i was IM’ing s. and told her that i think i went too far by dissing oprah. that’ll turn any room against you.